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Herman, will no longer be with you at this moment so for now I will be your regular teacher” As any 17 year old virgin (yes I’m still a virgin) my hormones were raging and I was getting a good hard-on. Great, why the fuck did I get put right in the front of the class. Right in the way where she can see my erection. Oh well. The rest of the class went on like a blur until the last fifteen minutes of the day I was caught daydreaming. “Mr. Jake what is the answer to the question” “Oh fuck” I thought damn here comes the detention that ruins my oh so perfect weekend with my parents and my stupid girlfriend. “Umm Ms. Tharpe I honestly do not know the answer” “Where you daydreaming in class” ‘’no shit” I said under my breath “I guess I was then”“See me after class Mr. Jake” “Yes Ma’am”After that little escapade class was over and as everyone packed up for the week-end I stayed in my desk and waited for my judgment. “Mr. Jake I cannot tolerate you not paying attention in my class and. Or am I projecting?Another customer, short and stocky, ambled in. Checked me up and down, turned to the sad-looking guy, “Who’s the slit?”“Whitetail.”Wuh-oh. Maybe he isn’t laughing on the inside after all. I looked at the sad man more closely. I saw Boo Radley looking like he was one gloomy day from cutting off an ear. He shot me the finger. Gringa.I finished my beer, straight from the bottle, forcing myself not to hurry. These were two skanky dudes. If I were a taxonomist, I’d classify them under a new subspecies. Asshola Triassic. Or something.Señor Mustache nudged his buddy, lifted his skinny right thigh, and cut loose a noisy, smelly, hot droodler. Laughed loudly.An odd thought popped into my mind, “If they hang you, I’ll pull on your legs.”The lucky part of my Texas Two-Step came that Tuesday night. I’d spent the day driving around the Dallas / Ft. Worth area, familiarizing myself with the territory. Getting lost repeatedly. But that’s actually a good way to get to know the.
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